Photo-Illustration: The Cut; Photos: Getty

Perhaps you have found your self hysterically weeping in a fast-food joint’s parking area, your very best buddy at the same time attempting to hand-feed you and hold the hair on your head right back whilst you yell, “Take me out! How can I ever continue? I’ll never love again!” through snotty rips? Or could you be … perhaps not gay?

Ah, heartbreak! The main reason tunes tend to be sung and mural art are coated, the determination behind high art-like

Romeo and Juliet

and

Red (Taylor’s Variation)

. I thought I’d observed almost everything, felt most of the disfatflirt comfort. But then I
began matchmaking ladies
— and unfortunately, something they forget to say at Lesbian Orientation is the first queer breakup will ruin you, in a “should I end up being hospitalized with this astounding and insurmountable putting up with” type of way. Ultimately experiencing physically and mentally lured (and dedicated) to someone you love merely hits different.

2-3 weeks before, i discovered myself for the throes of my first lesbian breakup. I chop up my personal ex’s top into a lot of pieces, smeared dog poop everywhere it, and remaining it for them to see in leading yard. However retired into the comfort of my own personal despair cave (my bed) and performed exactly what any heartbroken Gen Z–millennial cusp should do mid-breakup: doomscroll on TikTok inside early several hours. But as I launched the app additionally the little FBI guy during my cellphone shuttled myself straight away to the leading web page of Lesbian TikTok, I easily discovered the sapphic gods had not just arrive for me — they’d are available for people

all

. For the terms of queer TikToker Victoria Paris, ”
All of the white gay women tend to be battling!
”

Blame it from the
Lesbian Break Up Curse
. During the few days I happened to be unplugged from the online world, lying facedown to my kitchen flooring and experience sorry for myself, Lesbian TikTok positively imploded over several high-profile queer breakups that tore the #wlw community to pieces.

This indicates just as if most of the TikTok lesbians are splitting up while doing so, in addition to drama makes

Fancy Isle

appear to be young child’s play. Per some, the Curse was
at first cast
when lesbian pop celebrity Fletcher began teasing another track from the woman future record album,

Lady of My Ambitions

. The tune, “Becky’s very Hot,” talks of just how hot her ex’s brand-new gf is actually and implies that she desires learn how hot-girl Becky “tastes.” Fletcher’s ex, prominent LGBTQ YouTuber Shannon Beveridge, immediately got to TikTok herself in response on tune, clarifying that “no one requested authorization.” Gay
chaos
ensued.

All of a sudden, celebrity lovers ranging from A-lister
JoJo Siwa
and previous gf Kylie Prew, to college baseball star
Sedona Prince
and previous girlfriend Rylee LeGlue had been splitting up quicker than they may U-Haul originally. In addition to gays online happened to be Eating! It! Up! There were clapback duets, incriminating remark
posts
, not so sly trips to
Disneyland
, $80
merch
for sale,
exact receipts
— how do a lesbian with a full-time task and a screen-time restriction on her telephone probably actually maintain?! Well, I did just what any heartbroken lesbian needs to do at the same time such as this: we called out from work, popped many popcorn, took a couple of Klonopin, smashed that “Ignore maximum” switch, and held scrolling.

When you come at myself for reveling inside suffering of actual men and women, here is the one thing: When you’re is likely to dark destination, it could feel well to view somebody else’s life falter. Normally, why do we watch incredible fact programs like

Appreciation Island

or

90 Time Fiancé

? Also good old-fashioned rom-com can strike the area. Drama heals drama, and absolutely nothing shuts the human brain down that can compare with projecting your very own discomfort and enduring onto simple Brits which would like to get a hold of really love in a villa.

The Lesbian Breakup Curse is more than merely a strange (and perchance astrological) technology overpowering the social-media nourishes. It fills a necessity for material which is relatable, sensible, and connected to the queer community. When I had been finally capable secure my cellphone, dried out my rips, put-on some chunky platform shoes, and do the L.A. lesbian club scene by violent storm, the number 1 topic of talk was actually, predictably, the Curse. This is all of our Super Bowl.

Lesbian representation inside the mass media is actually little (and shady!) at best, once it comes to mindless gay break up content, its slim pickings for people queers. This obsession making use of exclusive internet dating resides of lesbian ladies comes from a desperation for really good gay TV. When we had a lesbian matchmaking show regarding carabiners, the Woods on a Wednesday night, and touring 12 several hours and three time zones for a first go out, we wouldn’t need to focus really on a “curse” which was discussed for all of us on TikTok.

Therefore indeed, it is correct I found myself a target of the Lesbian Breakup Curse (seemingly, it strikes people with fewer than 100 followers on TikTok, too), nevertheless pulled myself up from the bootstraps, slapped myself around several times, got me through the dog-poop period, and assisted me obtain some much-needed perspective. Actually, i believe We’ll loan my personal entire recovery into the Curse — we gays really carry one another upwards, do not we? And these are lifting up, right stress, no exes had been hurt into the authorship for this story. In fact, after half a session of couples therapy plus one Phoebe Bridgers show, we’re not precisely exes any longer. (Gay, I’m sure.)